What a difference 10 years makes. I mean, seriously, have you looked back on your life, your surroundings, and the world and how much has changed over the past 10 years? I ask this because as of next Sunday, February 14, 2010, my world forever changed, 10 years ago.
As far as time in the world surrounding, there was an entire two term president that my Mom never knew about. Two presidents that she knew and voted for passed away after she did. 9/11 never happened when she was alive. She never knew about airport security since before she passed, you could travel right to the gate with your loved one to watch them board the plane. Huge corporations began to collapse, eventually over lending and people buying homes they couldn't afford lead us to the place we're in now. My Mom was a conservative, so I'm sure I would hear her complain about those people who bought houses that they could never afford. Two invasions of Middle Eastern countries occurred and we still have troops over there. Katrina and other natural disasters (the Sumatra Earthquake, Haiti Earthquake) have occurred that could not even be imagined years ago.
Pop music culture has changed drastically! When she was sick, Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears were the most listened to music on the radio and Faith Hill and Tim McGraw where on top of the world in the country world. Now the two seem to have merged with people like Lady Antebellum and Taylor Swift. Lady Gaga and Nickleback have taken over many pop stations as has numerous R&B groups. Hollywood has run out of ideas for new and interesting movies. Instead, we get too many remakes or older book conversions or comic book heroes. But I still watch them just as much as ever!
In my own hometown, so many farm fields have disappeared to many housing developments thanks to out of control contractors who are now out of business... Meyer's Restaurant and Bakery closed up years ago, which made the best birthday cakes in the world! A whole new middle school has been built. The traffic along Rt. 309 is a crawl once rush hour hits or a holiday weekend is going on. Many new stores and shopping centers packed along a small stretch of highway. The place is hardly recognizable to me now and I realize it is no longer my home.
At the house where Dad still lives, nothing much has been improved or changed. Some weathering has occurred and Dad is now trying to reinsulate the downstairs bathroom. The barn hasn't been cleaned out or even touched since Mom's horse, Tosca, had to be put down. All the cats that we had when Mom was alive have been hit on the road or otherwise died except Suzy who loves tearing up Dad's couch! I remember when we bought that couch! It was from Ethan Allen! I was chatting with Dad last night and he told me a sad truth. He's lived in the farmhouse now longer without my mom than with her, by 3 years.
As for me, I know I've come full circle in the past 10 years. I was a goodie-too-shoe back in high school as a junior in my second semester. I had two proms (junior and senior), graduated from high school. I then went out to Arizona to attend the same college both my parents attended and met at. I started as an Astronomy Major then switched to Geology. I got a bit crazy and was somewhat of a wild child (a term my Dad used for Mom when she was in school). I dated a guy for too many years in a bad relationship that I thought I deserved. When I went on field camp (a month long camping trip to study rocks and all sorts of fun things like that!), I realized how freeing getting away from Tucson was for me. I spent the following month after that with my Dad over the summer. I realized how much I missed him and the East Coast seasons! The following semester I graduated after 4.5 years with a BS in Geosciences with an emphasis in Geological Engineering and Geophysics. When I moved back, I got a job almost immediately for a firm down in Philly. I had a blast going out with friends and dating, but became broke almost instantly! I lived there for about a year before realizing I was definitely NOT a city girl! It also didn't help that I met a country boy who lived north of my Dad. We dated for a week, but then I was introduced as his girlfriend at a party and I was not ready for that. Unfortunately, I fled for a while. But Rob's friend, Tara, talked to him for weeks to convince him not to give up on me. She is the whole reason why we stayed friends. She understood what I was feeling and how I wasn't ready for a relationship, and definitely not ready for the relationship that was about to change my entire life. We began dating, again, but this time seriously, after Tara was killed in a car wreck. After a few months of dating, we decided to move in together, much to Dad's dismay! I found a new job shortly after, still about an hour away. Then, Rob proposed to me on 9/8/07 in Virginia Beach. I found a job closer to where we lived in March of '08 and then we purchased our first home in June '08. Later that year, we were married in front of friends and family on 10/11/08. It was a bittersweet day, knowing both Mom and Rob's Dad were not physically there. But that day still remains the happiest day of my life so far. Now, Rob and I are expecting our first child, a girl to be named Tara Grace, after our friend as a tribute to her. We were never able to thank her while she was alive so we felt this is the best way to honor her.
Ten years is a long time, but yet, at the same time, it feels like just yesterday that Mom and I were out in the garden pulling weeds or going swimming or riding our horses. I only hope to be this close to my own daughter, yet remain a good and vigilant parent. I am scared of what the future holds, but at the same time, I try to focus on the positives in my life. I feel as though I have learned a good deal of life, though certainly not enough to consider myself intelligent on the subject. I passed that phase of 'know it all' once I met Rob and he changed my entire world and gave me something to look forward to, living ever day thanking God for the blessings He has bestowed upon me and my family.
